My Family Culture

How does one choose just three items representative of family culture?  Even more jarring is being faced with the possibility of starting anew in a new country and you are the minority culture.  My thoughts are jumbled as I am cataloging items of importance that would speak of my family culture.  How much of my family culture do I share all at once; do I focus on the external culture based on my olive-skinned appearance or the holidays we celebrate as a culture? Perhaps those characteristics are too superficial.    

I would most definitely bring a picture of my family, one that included my own children, parents and older brother, but one that included my aunts, uncles and cousins as they made up my entire cultural life.  My history is tied to all of them and growing up they were my social, and emotional circle.  My family, parents included gave definition to who I am, they were the driving force behind many of my choices and decisions.  The importance of my children being in the picture is the testament to the importance of my family culture and I have since passed on that culture to them so that it can be carried forward. 

Me and my children

Me with my mom, children and aunt

Along with the picture, I would bring a recipe of my favorite Greek meal.  My mom passed on recipes to me that I still prepare for my family.  The sharing of food, the different ingredients, the different tastes and textures are one way to get to know someone who is different.  Food connects us to our place of origin and is a non-invasive way to welcome strangers into our midst allowing they an opportunity to get to know us. 

My husband, my mom, my children and a family friend

I would then bring a gold cross that was given to me when I was just a baby and baptized into the Greek Orthodox faith.  The cross represents my religious beliefs.  The cross is also a mechanism that grounds me and provides me hope and understanding for the many challenges my family endured and that I have faced in my life.  My cross is the symbol of what keeps me moving forward.

   

Initially I was torn and saddened that I would be able to only keep one item.  How could I possible give up the picture of my heritage, my family?  I could describe them one by one keeping my story visible.  I could also write my story so that it would be preserved, so I chose to hold on to my cross.  The wearing of the cross would be an obvious, visible object of difference from my new home of which I am a stranger.  It is important for me to be the “different” one, as I cannot possible be like the culture I have now been immersed in.  The cross would raise questions that I would then be able to address, describing not only the meaning behind the cross, but describing the family which first gave me the cross and helped make me who I am.  It would be a constant reminder of my family, the values given to me by them along with the characteristics I display when doing things.  The cross would also be a source of strength and faith to help me survive in this new place. 

A Greek Orthodox Church in Athens, Greece

 I struggled to come up with a third item as I felt the family picture and my cross were sufficient.  I realized that I wanted to be noticed in this different country; I did not want to be like everyone else—that felt too sterile and robotic.  I wanted my characteristics to shine through and I wanted to be able to carry something that would be visible at all times and raised questions.  I believe though conversation we can keep our own culture alive and breathing, preserving it into the future.  I did want to live among the new culture in a peaceful accepting manner, but I also realized I did not want to be like the new culture; I wanted my culture to live alongside their culture.